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2:11 p.m. - 2001-11-29
Christie Pitts
I remember being on a tall platform at Christie Pitts swimming pool, the highest platform....for the very first time. Cheryl is behind me waiting to see if I will actually jump and if I do survive, thrive in my new found ability to rise, swim to the edge, not drown. In some similar ways, I'm ten years old again, trembling on that high cement tower, looking down into the blue, blue water. No one else is below me, in the way....no one is there to hold me back....but...should I jump?...should I play it safe?....Is it already too late, to play it safe?.......It would be so easy,and I'm drawn to just close my sleepy eyes and step off.....into love's caressing, refreshing, clear waters. If I surface, after infatuation's plunge.....when I open eyes... will he be there?....will he.... stay?.....will he, with a smile, a long hug....and a towel have a look that says, forever, or will he after some hesitation....walk away......I shudder....I can.... step back....but my joyful heart is full of youthful excitement, dizzy with giddy anticipation, thoughts of love..making love.....and it's tells me... not to take a backward step, nor even a backward glance.......while my head, forever the rational, sensible one.... is shouting, "Be careful, Elizabeth.....the waters of love can be sweet, turbulent and sometimes they can be bitter.....so very bitter.....you have lost so much!"....but my heart, always much more trustworthy......I think.......answers, "Love has also given you much, so much, much more!" The water is so mesmerizing, inviting, almost calling to me and then, as I hesitate, I hear Cheryl whisper, "Jump".

 

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